Saw that one online and in the newspaper this morning. Wow. Heather, just so you know I am married, but I think I could work it out if you're interested. My wife isn't all that fond of me these days anyway, so I'll bet we could buy her off cheap.
This sort of thing does make you wonder, though. I know she's aged a bit, and the last photo I saw of her suggested Botox to the nth degree, but she's still a babe and from all reports an intelligent, sweet, nice lady. Yet she's now going down for the second time. (I know there's a really rude joke in there about maybe that being the cause of the divorce, but I won't tell it here.)
I've seen pictures of her ex, Ritchie Sambora, and he's no Heather Locklear, I can tell you that. Yet at some point he probably got tired of boning Heather Locklear and decided to go after someone else. What does that say about him, and about men in general? Other than we're idiots.
Anyway, Heather, if I was married to you I would be kind and faithful to you always. I know you like musicians, and I do play the guitar. Not at Ritchie's level, maybe, but enough to keep you entertained on a cold winter's night. Give it some thought. We can make this thing work.
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