I know everyone is anxious to see OJ rot in jail and all, but I have conclusive proof that he did not go into that room with the intention to kill or to commit any violence.
Had he been looking to cause harm he would've worn gloves and used a knife. That's his MO. See? Hard to argue with fact.
Wednesday, September 19, 2007
Tuesday, September 18, 2007
Pay Per View idea
Ok, I have it. The ultimate pay per view event.
Britney Spears v. Lindsay Lohan in a drinking contest, to be followed immediately by Jello wrestling. Winner gets custody of the "Ultimate Human Train Wreck" trophy for a year, or until she actually completes a rehab stint that works. Whichever comes first.
Britney Spears v. Lindsay Lohan in a drinking contest, to be followed immediately by Jello wrestling. Winner gets custody of the "Ultimate Human Train Wreck" trophy for a year, or until she actually completes a rehab stint that works. Whichever comes first.
Tuesday, September 11, 2007
Brit, you're making it too easy
Had a chance to view Britney Spears' performance at the VMAs over the weekend. The word that has been generally used is "lackluster." That is the understatement of the year.
Watching her dance, she looks like a suburban housewife spending her first night at the bellydancing class offered by the local YMCA. She starts out looking confused, then sort of tentatively walks through the movements. Can this possibly be the same girl/woman who launched a thousand adolescent (and middle-aged man) fantasies?
Where is the bumping and grinding that says "Hey, if you ever quit loving me I can make a living working the pole at Scores in New York?" There's no strut as she walks from stage mark to stage mark. Heck, I've seen sexier walks at the local mall. Perhaps she's guilty of DUI -- dancing under the influence. Whatever it is, it's about as visually interesting as tapioca pudding.
Then there's the "singing" portion. As was widely reported, at some points she doesn't even pretend she's singing. The soundtrack goes on but her lips aren't moving as she looks furtively around, dazed and confused at the all the activity going on around her. At least Ashlee Simpson was aware that she wasn't lip synching to the soundtrack on SNL and seemed embarrassed. Brit looks like she doesn't care. Talk about phoning it in! The fembots in the Austin Powers movies looked less mechanical and brain dead than Brit.
My prediction? Next stop is Penthouse. Or maybe Hustler if those dark marks on her legs turn out to be bruises instead of shadows.
Suddenly Lindsay Lohan doesn't look so bad.
Watching her dance, she looks like a suburban housewife spending her first night at the bellydancing class offered by the local YMCA. She starts out looking confused, then sort of tentatively walks through the movements. Can this possibly be the same girl/woman who launched a thousand adolescent (and middle-aged man) fantasies?
Where is the bumping and grinding that says "Hey, if you ever quit loving me I can make a living working the pole at Scores in New York?" There's no strut as she walks from stage mark to stage mark. Heck, I've seen sexier walks at the local mall. Perhaps she's guilty of DUI -- dancing under the influence. Whatever it is, it's about as visually interesting as tapioca pudding.
Then there's the "singing" portion. As was widely reported, at some points she doesn't even pretend she's singing. The soundtrack goes on but her lips aren't moving as she looks furtively around, dazed and confused at the all the activity going on around her. At least Ashlee Simpson was aware that she wasn't lip synching to the soundtrack on SNL and seemed embarrassed. Brit looks like she doesn't care. Talk about phoning it in! The fembots in the Austin Powers movies looked less mechanical and brain dead than Brit.
My prediction? Next stop is Penthouse. Or maybe Hustler if those dark marks on her legs turn out to be bruises instead of shadows.
Suddenly Lindsay Lohan doesn't look so bad.
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